The Hidden Habits That Could Be Holding You Back

This photo was from my first (fantastic) trip to Norfolk last week, the simple patterns in the sand made me think about how even the simplest patterns can scale

We all have patterns.

Ways of thinking. Ways of working.

Ways of reacting under pressure.

Some serve us. Some don’t.

When you’re accelerating in your career or feeling stuck-it’s easy to focus on doing more, pushing harder, striving.

But what if the real shift comes from looking at how you’re doing what you’re doing?

In coaching, one of the most powerful things we do is spot patterns.

Not just what the person is saying in a coaching session, but how they say it.

Where the energy rises. Where it dips.

What’s repeated. What’s avoided.

Sometimes, it’s about holding onto a goal that no longer fits.

Sometimes, it’s a story you’ve told yourself for so long, you’ve stopped questioning it.

“I need to prove myself.”

“Leadership is about directing, I need to be the most knowledgeable in the team”

"I need to be able to answer every question perfectly within a client meeting" (forgetting to show curiosity in them)

“If I don’t do it, no one will.”

Sound familiar? These stories become patterns. And while they may have helped in the past, they may now be holding you back.

I’ve seen these patterns in myself.

Very early in my career on the Buying team at Sainsbury’s, a high-pressure, high-visibility environment-I naively assumed that those above me would know that I was ambitious and keen to take on more. They didn’t. I quickly learned that if I wanted to grow, I had to ask for it. That was a pattern I am thankful for breaking early in my career.

However, other patterns took longer to identify.

Whenever I stepped into a new role, I tend to go in at full tilt, no ramp-up, just straight into proving myself. It often worked: strong start, quick trust, fast results.

But beneath that, I was overthinking every move. Leaning hard on my drive and then second-guessing myself and questioning whether I was on the right path-even when things were going well.

Working with a coach helped me identify and name the pattern. They helped me understand that my drive wasn’t the issue, it just needed to be channelled differently.

Coaching helps you zoom out. To see not just the steps you’re taking, but the way you’re stepping.

We also look at where patterns are shifting. Where you're adapting. Growing. Trying something new.

These are moments of real power, if you notice them.

So, ask yourself:– Are your patterns helping you progress, or keeping you stuck?

– What have you outgrown, but are still clinging to?

– Where are you playing it safe in ways that don’t serve you?

Sometimes the performance leap isn’t about doing things faster, it’s about doing them differently.

With more creativity.

More intention.

More personalisation to the context you’re in.

If you are interested in hearing more about my Career Acceleration Programme, I would love to hear from you at mj@belvederecoaching.com